eto, buhay pa…

It’s been a pretty tough week and this is definitely a well-deserved quiet long weekend. Our US counterpart flew in last weekend and it’s been extra busy at the office. I’ve been going to the office REALLY early from having to pick him up at his hotel during his first day (at this point, I never thought I would see the light of day at exactly 7AM) to having to catch his KT sessions at 10am all week. The KT sessions take two to four hours everyday on top of having to attend other meetings, plan other non-work things (newsletter articles, community events, meetings, lunch, dinner, night out for our expat – I’m not sure why when I’m not really gaining anything by doing these and now people just EXPECT me to be doing these by default and I just don’t like being obliged for anything especially when for something that’s not really part of my job, SO yes, this has been the subject of my constant ranting lately and might be worth another blog entry), and (still) doing the actual tech work.

Over one of our lunches with the expat, I asked him if it was odd at all that Filipinos just generally seem like happy people. He said this was something he did notice and that even at the Atlanta office, people just weren’t as friendly and he begun telling us about the drama that goes on during planning which of course we never really notice over the very impersonal emails and calls.  We really do seem always so happy – if you ask someone how he’s doing, he will say eto buhay pa HAHAHA despite the very depressing state in which he lives, say, he lives in urban slums. And it’s great really that we always find something funny but sometimes I actually think that this is not a good thing. If we can deal with life just laughing it all off with a dismissive ganyan talaga ang buhay, it’s not really going to take us anywhere… better. This is how we live, the sad state of how we live makes us laugh, and it’s ok because that’s just how it is. – It just doesn’t sound right. There is no need for us to try harder or strive for anything better with this kind of thinking.

*******

Meanwhile, I almost crawled going home after the Thursday night out with the team. The last time I remember being really wasted before that was back in summer in SG. But that was excusable because I didn’t know the brew was stronger with higher alcohol content which should have been an easy thing to guess considering that 1 barrel of beer costs 3K.  I believe I lost a pound or two just from the effort of having to throw up last Thursday.  Friday was my Ram day, spent at his house while nursing my hangover. UNFORTUNATELY her sister ran into us and I looked horrible and this is bad because I happen to know for a fact that she is also kupal hahaha. I had a ginormous pimple from having slept with makeup (gaaaaaaaaah) because I was too drunk. Saturday was spent in bed since my body still ached all over. Ram and I did grab dinner and a few things from Rockwell though. It’s the 70% off Sale Weekend. And Baker’s Dozen is still there. He missed his East 19 gimik at Sucat and I missed Teena’s invite for Metrowalk. Our wakeboarding weekend has been moved to the last week of October. We will be heading to the Bonifacio pool tomorrow to do some laps. It’s been weeks since we did anything physical (except.. eherrmm haha).

*******

For the first time in 2 years, I am on top of my finances. And I feel relieved that I will not have to think about how reckless I am and feel bad about it. Diet is bad and I’ve been eating recklessly resulting to another very bad pimple breakout. I’m also behind on the healthy routine, smoking too much on some days and not being able to work out. Work, on the other hand is great nowadays while I don’t see as much of Ram on weekdays. I realized that at any point in time, I can’t be doing great in everything – work, finances, health, personal well being – something always gets the backseat. And I really wish that’s not how I run my life, with some things getting the backseat so I can focus on what seems (temporarily) important. There is always a gap between how things are at present and how I want things to be. And I’m always trying to close that gap and GET THERE.